Posted by Stacy McDonald on August 12, 2011
I was contemplating recently why I don’t care for the term “abuser.” It’s certainly an accurate description at times. I wondered if perhaps it was the overuse of the word that bothered me; and I think that is definitely part of it. However, I think I mostly flinch at the word because we are all abusers – every time we sin against someone we are “abusing” them. People are not put on this earth for me to egotistically use. When I am selfish or unkind, or when I manipulate someone else, I am “abusing” them. If I scream at my children to get them to obey me, I am not correcting them biblically; rather, I am in a sense “abusing” them. But, that alone does not make me an automatic “abuser.”
So, what makes the chronic, controlling “abuser” different from the everyday sinner who offends, regrets that offense, and repents? And what would be a more accurate and distinct term for him? I think the word “tyrant” is more fitting- and I’m leaning toward defining the domestic version this way: (more…)
Posted by Stacy McDonald on December 12, 2010
This article was originally published in 2009 at Your Sacred Calling. I’m including it here because some of the accusations from the QD movement have involved a general assumption of what “everyone” means when they use the word “quiverfull.” Is it possible that those who have been the most rigid and “judgmental” concerning the use of birth control, are the ones who are now crying, “legalism”? It’s an interesting consideration.
Posted by House Manager on December 7, 2010
By James McDonald
“Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled…” (Hebrews 12:14-15)
Bitterness is a common sin within the sons of Adam and the daughters of Eve. It is one we often try to hide, at least for a while. But bitterness, like holding one’s breath, can’t be detained for long. In the end, it overtakes us and becomes our constant focus. A most hated and beloved idol, bitterness is the cancer that consumes. It is a self-destructive sin that triggers an addictive adrenaline rush that floods our being. And, like most addictive behaviors, when out of control, it leads to our destruction.
Posted by Stacy McDonald on November 30, 2010
Posted by Kelly Crawford on November 25, 2010
As we’ve pointed out in previous posts, while we believe that the Quivering Daughters movement has caused more harm than good, it has also brought up some valid points that might be good warnings to all parents.
Just because someone responds unbiblically does not mean that what they are responding to is without fault. So, as parents, let’s ask God to examine our hearts.
Read the following self check and ask the Lord to show you areas of sin that require repentance and restoration: (more…)
Posted by House Manager on November 24, 2010
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11)
Every time I’ve shared portions of my life story with others I’ve been told, “You should really write a book.” I guess in some ways it’s true. My life has seen a bit of drama. I was born to a 16-year-old unwed mother and, because of birth complications, spent months in the hospital before being placed in foster care. I wasn’t adopted until I was two years old because my birthmother refused to sign the papers, hoping to find a way to keep me. When she turned 18, she and her boyfriend (not my birthfather) approached her parents with the hope of marrying and getting me back from foster care. She was told that it was in my best interest for her to go on to nursing school as she had planned. She listened and signed the papers.
Posted by ChristendomBuilder on November 21, 2010
I never realized how easy it is to abuse people! This website has hardly been live for a week and already we are being accused of abusing people through what we have written.
Saint Irenaeus help us!
Posted by Stacy McDonald on November 18, 2010
According to Webster’s 1828 Dictionary, the word abuse is defined as “ill use; maltreatment; misuse with bad motives or to wrong purposes.” It goes on to describe an abuser as “a ravisher or a sodomite.”
The Online Etymology Dictionary defines abuse literally as: to “use up;” “to misuse sexually.” Basically, to abuse is to use to the extreme something or someone (including ourselves) improperly, and to a bad end. To abuse is to “use wrongly.”
Posted by Stacy McDonald on November 18, 2010
“It’s time to get rid of that Freudianism, which seems to permeate everybody’s thinking, and return to the Bible. If the Bible teaches that Christianity does anything it teaches us that it frees us to serve God – no matter what has happened in the past….I don’t want to minimize the tragedy of true abuse or the sin that was behind it. But, then, psychologists teach people to build a lifestyle around the abuse: “I am an abused person.” Not “I’m a farmer, a mother, a child,” or anything else. I’m an “abused person.” A whole present lifestyle is built around the past.” - Jay Adams
If you’ve been abused, don’t let it identify you. Abuse is real because sin is real. We can either live in the past or we can lay it at the foot of the cross and not look back. If you are a child of the King, you are no longer a slave to sin…neither your own sin, nor the sin of anyone else. Don’t exchange one form of bondage for another.
Posted by lifetapestry on November 16, 2010
In the self-published book, Quivering Daughters, Hillary McFarland takes the reader on a journey into her own troubled past. She communicates her pain, her disappointments, and her hopes.
Hillary had no trouble convincing me of her sincere love for Christ and her desire to know Him. I found her to be expressive, intense, and creative and I am convinced that, through her writings, she desires to help other young women who are trying to sort through their own painful pasts.